Alhamdulilah

Whatever life brings me it will always be "Alhamdulilah". I was thinking (in a glazed over state) about my travel through islam. I reverted to islam four and a half years ago, Alhamdulilah. It's strange but I can honestly say that through that time the worst things in my life have happened to me. The worst. I often wonder how I've had the strength to move on at times. There is only one answer, Allah. I believe and pray to Allah to keep me safe from harm and protect me.

Again today Allah has saved me from something. I am divorced. Alhamdulilah. My two day marriage is now over. Only Allah knows why. Alhamdulilah. I was so afraid to marry, afraid to trust. If I ever do get married again (I am really starting to believe I won't) it will have to be someone miraculous. I have lost all trust in the muslim brothers. I know there are some good ones out there somewhere, but how to trust? You just never know. I am truly afraid of the thought of marriage now. There is only one way to trust, through the trust of Allah. Alhamdulilah. Even before deciding on this marriage, I gave it up to Allah. With every prayer I told Allah that all my trust was with him. I'm single again, it's a disappointment, but I know there is a reason for it, even if that reason will never be revealed to me. All praises and thanks are to Allah.