Learning to Let Go

"Pooh," whispered Piglet.

"Yes, Piglet?" said Pooh.

"Oh, nothing," said Piglet.

"I just wanted to be sure of you."

Sometimes we just want to know that someone else is there. We want that reassurance that someone is there who loves us and cares about us. Can we ever really have that 100% assurance of this? Only one that I can be sure of is Allah, God. I don't put too much faith or trust in other people, they only tend to disappoint. I can only rely on Allah to guide me through this life. Though I know I won't get a vocal answer to reassure me, I know Allah is there because my prayers are answered.

What does this have to do with learning to let go? Everything. I used to dwell on so much and have such anxiety over the simplest things. Since accepting Islam I have learned that I don't really have control over that much. Things happen. Good things happen and bad things happen, but they all happen for a reason.

I had the hardest time letting go of my first love. We couldn't be together and I didn't want to accept that. Circumstances kept driving us apart, but I wanted to believe that it would happen some way. It didn't. It has taken years, but I have finally let him go. Alhamdulilah.

It really is because of my ex-husband that I have learned how to better let go. He is the example of everything I NEVER want to be. He has hurt me in more ways than I ever thought was possible. He claims he loves me and we will be together again (that will never happen). How can he love me and want me to be so miserable? If he really loved me, he would let go and let me seek happines in this world. He wouldn't hold on and try to force something where it doesn't fit.

I don't ever want to try to force something where it doesn't fit. Even if I love someone I will bow out gracefully if it doesn't seem to work. This has happened twice to me. Well, with my first love it took me a long time to learn this. I simply thought I belonged with him, it just wasn't so. Recently, though, I have had this situation and I had to let go. I would have loved nothing more than to stick through it and try to make it work, but I just had to let go. I had to let go.