A Fine Day

That's sarcasm!

I dreamed of Mr. U last night. I would really like to get over that situation, considering I haven't even talked to him in 5 weeks! That's just the problem though. I never got an explanation as to what happened. There's no closure. I don't think of him during the day anymore. So, instead, he bothers me at night in my sleep! Fabulous! The worst part is that I don't really want to talk to him ever again. I am getting over it and moving on. What if he calls and stirs up all my emotions again? I couldn't handle that, I'm afraid of it. I don't even know why I got so darned attatched to him in the first place. I just want to move on and be happy.

There is another sadness that is really bothering me today. Mr. First Love and I got into an argument on the phone last week. We just aren't as nice to each other as we used to be. It could be since I fell for someone else I just want to push him away. I thought that we would always have a friendship. I thought that we would always communicate, at least by email. I don't want to talk on the phone with him since I am trying to find someone else. It really isn't a good idea, and I know this. However, I didn't want it to come crashing down the way it did. We argued and hung up. Then it was text messages saying that we shouldn't talk anymore. I tried to call because I wanted to say it voice-to-voice. I wanted to wish him well and go our separate ways. He didn't answer the phone. His text message was not the nicest. Now I'm stuck with a horrible feeling. The past 5 years of part relationship and part friendship has ended in a crappy way. I don't want to remember him in the bad way it ended, I would rather remember the 5 years worth where we got along and next to never fought. I hope we will get the chance to talk one time to wish each other well and go along our own ways.