I realized last night as I was driving that the one thing I'd been missing for months finally had a name. You know when a piece of you is missing, it's just more difficult when you can't even figure out what that piece is. Do I feel better now that my missing piece has a name? Not really. In a way it only makes it that much sadder, and disappointing. I want to be in a profession where I try to inspire this in other people. How can I inspire others if I, myself, don't have it?
After months (more accurately a couple of years) of being trampled on, and pushed down, how can I feel it? How can I feel that things will get better when they never do? I feel like I am a hamster running in a wheel. I run like the wind, but the destination never changes. How do I motivate myself out of this place, and get back what is missing?